This month has dragged on forever...

I don't know why, but it seems like February doesn't want to end... The shortest month of the year my ass! XD Thankfully it will be March tomorrow which also means that I get paid... Between paying all of our bills and other expenses, both Rob and I are almost completely broke... *Sigh*

I had to go to Plymouth today to go to the post office, pick up my Percocet script, and then did some light grocery shopping. The pharmacy at Hannaford can be slow at times and I hit them on a slow day today... :\ It took them nearly a half hour to fill my 14 pill prescription... The store was packed because of the snow storm that's coming in tonight and that will last tomorrow...

Timothy is all excited for the snow. He can't wait to get on his sled and go down the hill out back a hundred or so times... That's fine with me, it takes all the energy out of him and he's easier to deal with after he's been out playing... Aren't I awful?! XD Rob has already called in to work because of the bad weather predicted for tomorrow... He doesn't usually mind driving in bad weather, but when you're talking about these types of conditions it's not worth the risk. He said that they'd probably cancel all deliveries for tomorrow anyway.

One more thing... This month it will be my brother Michael's 26th birthday. Instead of buying myself or Rob something, I'm going to go all out and get him as much as I can! My parents are throwing him a party on his big day and I will be venturing down to Mass to attend. Tell me this isn't weird... His birthday is March 19th, which also happens to be Mana's birthday and also the day that one of his favorite Japanese wrestlers died... I remember him when the wrestler died... He was so depressed that he wouldn't eat any of his birthday food and he just seemed underwhelmed despite the fact that he got so many presents. He thinks about it every year now, but he's more cheery than he was in 2003 after the death...

Well, that's about all for now, darlings! I hope you're all having a wonderful day/evening and a nice Thursday for you all! <3 <3 <3 *

+Rei Bathory+

MALICE MIZER - Garnet ~kindan no sono e~ (2001)

Here it is, MALICE MIZER's last CD release ever... It's unfortunate that this had to be the end of such a great band. I don't think it was even a month after this was released that they disbanded... Garnet is a very pretty song, not quite as hard as Beast of Blood, but still very rockish... Again, the instrumentation and vocals are spot on as always. I don't think there are too many MALICE MIZER songs that miss their mark...

The b-side, Gensou Rakuen (Paradise of Illusion) is one of my favorite MM tracks ever! It is much more aggressive than Garnet and if you've ever heard any of MALICE MIZER's lives from 2000 on, you will appreciate this song! The studio version doesn't quite live up to the live version, but that shouldn't deter you! It is still a beautiful track and like I said, showcased where Mana would eventually end up with Moi dix Mois' sound.

I hope you'll grab this if you don't already have it! Again, I used fileserve because of the problems with Mediafire. I don't even really like Mediafire anyway, too many advertisements and spyware... Enjoy! <3 <3 <3 MALICE MIZER - Garnet ~kindan no sono e~ Tracklist: 01. Garnet ~kindan no sono e~ 02. Gensou Rakuen 03. Garnet ~kindan no sono e~ (Instrumental) 03. Gensou Rakuen (Instrumental) Download

MALICE MIZER - Beast of Blood (2001)

Here is MALICE MIZER's second to last CD release ever. Beast of Blood is unique because it represents yet another shift in musical style, something the band was very well known for. This sort of marked the beginning of what Moi dix Mois was going to be. The title track is full of harpsichord with amazing guitar work and Klaha delivers a flawless vocal track!

The title track, the b-side (Baptism of Blood) and the hidden bonus track "bara no souretsu" are all haunting and beautiful at the same time. bara no souretsu was originally written by Kami, the band's former drummer who died of a sub-arachnoid bleed in his brain in 1999. After his death, the band evolved into an incredibly dark look and sound, and this track is definitely dark. Yu~ki (the bands bassist) had a hand in creating this track also. If any one song can haunt your thoughts while listening to it, it's this one. It is purely instrumental but I think adding vocals to it would have been wrong. Mana once simply stated in an interview that the fans would know why it is on this single and that's all he would say...

Just something for note, I used fileserve to upload this because darling was having problems with Mediafire. You should still get a good download speed on this site, though! <3 I hope that if you haven't heard this before, you will check it out! This is too beautiful to be missed! MALICE MIZER - Beast of Blood Tracklist: 01. Beast of Blood 02. Baptism of Blood 03. Beast of Blood (Instrumental) 04. bara no souretsu
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I don't undestand what's going on anymore...

So yesterday my head was bothering me and I took one of those migraine pills... Headache gone. I felt fine for most of today and then I took a nap up in my room late this afternoon. Timothy was right in the next room over playing his Wii, so if he needed anything, he could have woken me up... Luckily he was fine and I didn't hear a peep out of him until Rob came in from work...

Rob woke me up to make sure that I was okay, and then we noticed it. My hands and just about the rest of my skin was ice cold. On top of that, my lips are a very light shade of blue. I don't know how they got like that or why my skin is freezing because I felt warm and cozy in my bed... I'm guessing that it's something to do with blood circulation, I know I have poor circulation in some parts of my body, especially my hands...

If that's not enough, my left knee was fucking killing me upon waking up! That had locked itself up nice and tight and was causing me some serious pain! I did not take a Percocet, however, I just toughed it out even though it made me almost fall down the stairs... eh heh... If it wasn't for this fucking deformity, I wouldn't have these problems... As it is, I have the knees of a 40-year-old woman because the deformity has caused so much damage... I'll be in a wheelchair by the time I'm 50 if I manage to make it that long without chopping them off myself... And yes, that is what I was told by an orthopedist... eh heh...

Well, that is all for now, darlings! I hope you're all having a nice day and evening! Oh, and we're supposed to be getting a storm in here tomorrow afternoon that's going to dump up to 10 inches of snow on us! Yay! More weather to aggravate the arthritis... Have a lovely Wednesday! <3 <3 <3 *

+Rei Bathory+

Oh, my pretty little head...

Okay, so I don't have a little head... Some people have told me that it's kind of big... eh heh... But that doesn't matter. What does matter is that I can't shake these fucking headaches! Glasses, contacts, it matters not... I keep getting them after being on the computer, playing games, or even just watching TV...

I don't know if it's just my sinuses or what, but I've got to get something done about them! I have migraine pills, but I only get 10 a month because that's all my insurance will pay for... They help sometimes, but considering that I have to use them so sparingly, I have to decide when I really need the aid of a pill. I wish Percocet got rid of headaches, but alas, it does not... *Sigh*

Timothy is now on school vacation, so I had him all day and that can be a headache (literally) in and of itself... On top of Timothy, though, Rob's brother's car is on the fritz again and they had to borrow mine to take Marissa to the doctor's... Therefore I was stuck with Jason for about 2 hours... Timothy gets all hyped up when Jason comes over, he just wants to play with him... What he doesn't understand is that babies require 1,000 % attention and I can't do everything at once. For instance, he wanted lunch, but I was changing a diaper... I must have told him that there wasn't enough of me to go around about 50 times during that two hour period...

Well, that is all for now, darlings! I must go make dinner for my boys and then I will go lie down in the dark so my head will stop throbbing... I think I'll have one of those pills, too! Have a lovely evening and a nice Tuesday, all of you! <3 <3 <3 *

+Rei Bathory+

MALICE MIZER - Gardenia (2001)

I'm not feeling like the most social creature today, so I just figured that I'd upload music for today's posts... This is one of MALICE MIZER's final releases. There would be only two more singles released after Gardenia and then the band would go on their "Indefinite Hiatus". It's unfortunate, because the last three singles were some of the band's best works ever.

Gardenia was also the first release to feature Klaha officially named as the band's vocalist. He had been singing for the band since 2000, but was not recognized as a full time member until this. His voice was so amazing, even if his solo project was sort of a bust, his voice was perfectly suited to MALICE MIZER's sound.

Gardenia is a very pretty song, starting with the prologue. You'll be instantly hooked once you hear it! This song is very mellow and ethereal and I strongly urge you to check out the PV! The imagery is fantastic, proving further more that MALICE MIZER was a Visual Kei Tour de Force! I love everything that Mana did with the music here, especially the maracas! XD The vocals are equally pretty, this whole damn single is a lesson in gorgeousness! <3 houkai jokyoku is a big departure from Gardenia. It is very dark and is primarily electronic with haunting vocals! Then of course there are the instrumentals, something that has seemingly disappeared from modern day VK singles... They're always fun to sing along to or just enjoy all the nuances that you don't hear with the vocals. I hope you'll all give this single a listen! Enjoy! <3 <3 <3 * MALICE MIZER - Gardenia Tracklist: 01. prologue ~kaisou~ 02. Gardenia 03. houkai jokyoku 04. Gardenia (Instrumental) 05. houkai jokyoku (Instrumental)
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Atsushi Sakurai - Ai no Wakusei (2004)

Atsushi Sakurai is best known as the front man for the legendary and wildly successful Jrock group, BUCK-TICK. BUCK-TICK has been around since the mid-1980's and they are still going strong today. There hasn't even been a lineup change in all of that time. The band is known for their unique albums that feature all sorts of different sounds, no one song sounds like another...

However, in 2004, Sakurai took a break from his band and ventured out to do a solo project. This album was released to great fanfare, but unfortunately it is the only one ever released from this solo project. There are also a few singles (which I have if anyone wants them) and a live DVD from this project.

Much like BUCK-TICK's albums, the songs on Ai no Wakusei are all unique. There are all different flavors of music on this album. I think there is something for everyone's taste here and you will most certainly not regret downloading it! My personal favorites are SACRIFICE (LAST CONFUSED MIX), YELLOW PIG, X-LOVER, Yokan (2004 re-construct), and Wakusei.

I finally got Mediafire to work for me, so you should get a nice download speed when you grab this. Enjoy! <3 <3 <3 * Atsushi Sakurai - Ai no Wakusei Tracklist: 01. SACRIFICE (LAST CONFUSED MIX) 02. YELLOW PIG 03. X-LOVER 04. I HATE YOU ALL 05. WONDERFUL WORLD (INJECTION TO UK MIX) 06. SMELL 07. MARCHEN 08. FANTASY 09. Taiji 10. Hallelujah! 11. Shingetsu 12. Yokan (2004 re-construct) 13. Wakusei 14. Neko Download

Four new pieces...

Here is the art that I've been promising! "Eye in a cup" is a take off of "Heartless", it's the same character only she's taken her eye out... This is sort of a way to express my feelings of wanting to hurt myself all the time. Of course, I'm not tearing my heart or my eyes out, but you get the point. "Pretty smiles" is just something I came up with on the fly. It's not as detailed as some of my other drawings, but I wanted a sort of minimalist approach to this one.

"Land of Monsters" is the surreal piece that I was talking about. It took me a few days to get this one done. It's not the most complex painting that I've ever done, but I wanted something different than what I usually do... I hope you guys like it! And then there is "Ode to self-harm" which is an abstract piece. Again, this is obviously dealing with my self-harm issues but in a much more violent and abstract way. If you look closely you can see the "cuts" in the picture. I was pretty depressed when I did that last night... It actually stopped me from actually hurting myself, so I guess I should do more like this in the future.

Enjoy the art, guys! I hope all of the drawings and paintings are to your liking! Have lovely day and a nice rest of your weekend! <3 <3 <3 *

+Rei Bathory+

Yay! Snow!

After a very strange winter, we're finally getting a decent storm this evening! It is currently snowing out and we're expected to get anywhere from 3-7 inches of the white stuff. This is pretty much the first real storm this month, outside of a couple that have only left us with a little bit. It was supposed to start this morning, but the first batch slipped to our south.

That's a good thing, because Timothy got to go to school before his winter break starts... He was hoping to wake up to a blizzard so he didn't have to go, but was disappointed to find not even a trace in the AM. XD Rob stayed home from work again because he's still not feeling well, but at least he has the weekend to recuperate...

We had company late this morning up until about 2:30 this afternoon in the form of Stephanie and Jason. She brought us food! She brought brownies with M&M's on them and steak tips and rice! <3 Jason was adorable as always. I bought him a little book the other day, Old McDonald and I read that to him and made all of the animal noises while reading it. eh heh... He enjoyed it, which is all that matters. The only thing is, carrying him around and getting down on the floor to play with him killed my back... I'm really stoned on Percocet right now because of the tremendous pain...

Just an update from yesterday, Timothy has been on much better behavior since last night's punishment for abusing the cats... I had a talk with him about being nicer to the animals and he has been, at least for now.

Well, that is all for now, darlings! They're calling for wind gusts over 45 MPH tomorrow so if I'm not around we lost our power... It takes a lot to knock the power out around here so I'm not betting on it, but I just don't want you to worry! Have a lovely evening and a nice start to your weekend! <3 <3 <3 *

+Rei Bathory+

Aww, Rob is sick... And I drew something...

Isn't she cute? Too bad her apple is poisoned... hehe... Ever since I finished up those three pieces from the other night, I've been in a real artsy mood. I actually have a painting in the works that should be done by the weekend. It's a sort of surreal piece, that's all I'll say until I post it. ;) I hope you guys enjoy this one for now! <3

And yes, poor Rob got up this morning and I've apparently given him one of my illnesses... eh heh... He woke up with a very sore throat, so bad that it hurt him to swallow or even talk. He's got an upset stomach as well as an ear ache. Needless to say, he stayed home from work today. I've been tending to him as best I can and we watched one of his new wrestling DVD's today. It was a 4 1/2 hour one called Wrestle Kingdom VI, the biggest Japanese wrestling show of the year. It was really good, I thought! ^^

Timothy is sort of being a pain in the ass today, he won't leave Rob alone... When he found out that Rob wasn't going to work this morning, he wanted to stay home, too. When he got home, he was "Daddy" this and "Daddy" that... Let the man rest! *Sigh* He's on punishment until dinner time because outside of bothering Rob, he wouldn't stop pulling the cat's tails... Juliet has lived in fear of him since she got here, he just won't stop... :\

Well, that is about all for now, darlings. I hope you like the drawing and are having a nice day/evening. A lovely Friday for you all! <3 <3 <3 *

+Rei Bathory+

Oh, so delicious... This man will not stop spoiling me...

Rob just treated us to a restaurant that I haven't been to in like 2 years... It's called Fresolone's and while it's just a pizza and sub shop, they make the best fucking food in those categories. I had a steak and cheese sub and some onion rings and I could eat a whole other sub right now... It's that good! Rob and Timothy split a large pizza and they seemed to enjoy it, too!

I also had to go to Pain Care today to pick up my Percocet 5's, and it was quick and painless... They're sticking to their promise of only piss testing me once a month! Yay! So now I've got those and the bottle of 30's that Rob bought, you know I'll be high for the rest of the week! XD I also figured out what has been the matter with me over the past few days as far as feeling dizzy and lost and all that fun stuff...

I ran out of my Klonopin last week and it was while I had that stomach bug. After the sick feeling wore off, I was left feeling half dead and I couldn't figure out why, until this afternoon... I refilled my Klonopin and took 3 of them right after I got out of the store. Half way home, I started feeling like myself again! I was withdrawing from the Klonopin! I've gone off of them before and not had that happen, but this time it did! So now I know to be more careful with those... I swear, I've almost passed out like 5 times within the last week and I had no clue why... eh heh...

And speaking of being spoiled, I forgot to mention that I got some new games yesterday. I got Onechanbara: Bikini Samurai Squad (What? I like playing games that involve half-naked women fighting zombies...) and Assassins Creed 2! Rob bought them for me after tiring of listening to me complain about how I had nothing to play. I haven't really gotten deep into either one yet, but I will either tonight or tomorrow...

Well, that's all for now, darlings! I hope all of you are having a lovely day and a nice evening! A wonderful start to your Thursday, all of you! <3 <3 <3 *

+Rei Bathory+

Some new pretties...

So I've been really busy since I last posted... I did the two pencil drawings within about two hours of each other and Rose Princess was a project that I've been working on since yesterday. "Val the birthday girl" is a take off of "Cake Massacre" that I posted last time. I wanted to modify her and give her a name, and I did! "Heartless" is just something that popped into my head. Well, that and often times when I stare at myself in the mirror for too long, I think I have no heart, so... eh heh... I hope you guys enjoy the art! I must be getting off this machine and back to my sweetie who awaits me in the bedroom... hehe! <3 Have a lovely night, guys! <3 <3 <3 *

+Rei Bathory+

Goddamn fucking mania... *Grumble*

I was up all fucking night last night and I'm running on very little sleep today... I managed to stay up long enough to get Timothy off to school and then I finally crashed for a few hours. However, upon waking up I felt like complete shit again. Even with the Percocet in my body, I feel light-headed and floaty... That and my body is just completely rundown... *Sigh*

If that's not bad enough, I had shit to do today. I had to go to Walmart to get my oil changed and I had to buy some things. After that, I had to go get Timothy off the bus, and then we had to go and do laundry... Do you know how fucking hard it is to keep a six-year-old amused at a laundromat?! eh heh... If only my washing machine still worked... But it's broken and my landlord doesn't want to fix it.

Even if my machine still worked, I would have been doing laundry well into the night because all the bedding had to be done... So it was just as well that I had to go out, because they have the industrial-size machines there... It's all done now and all that's left to do is to put it all away. I'm making Rob help me because my back has had it already...

All I want to do is go to sleep... I'm supposed to be going to Dartmouth tomorrow, but I'm considering cancelling the appointment. I know that I have to take care of these headaches, but I don't know if I'm up for 2 hours each way. Not to mention, I paid $3.59 for a fucking gallon of gas today... If that's any indication of where the prices are going, I'm in for headaches that not even my neurologist can cure... eh heh...

Well, I must be going now... I have to eat something and then get all this shit put away. I hope all of you are having a nice day and are more alert than I am at the moment. A wonderful evening and a nice start to your Wednesday, all of you! <3 <3 <3 *

+Rei Bathory+

There is a god and his name is Percocet... Oh, and I'm a total fucking retard...

Rob comes through again! I've once again flooded my body with narcotics thanks to Rob purchasing Percocet illegally... ;) I'm so thankful he has drug connections, because mine have all dried up. He came home with a full script of 30's today and I pretty much jumped him for the bottle... eh heh...

I feel so much better! My ribs don't hurt and the nausea has subsided thanks to the pills! Of course, Rob called his brother and told him to come over and pick up a few for himself, because god forbid he not get any... He's always got his hand out and he never gives anything back. I do feel kind of bad for him, though... He's got this thing growing on his foot that is causing him great deals of pain and he's got to have it surgically removed... It's already deforming his little toe... However, had he not come over I would be in some serious trouble...

You see, David brought the kids with him and Marissa asked Timothy why he wasn't on the bus today... I thought "Huh? It's February vacation... Why did she ask him that?" Then I said it out loud and David told me that vacation doesn't start until next week... WTF?! I looked at the school calendar and sure enough, it doesn't start until next week...

I asked Timothy why he didn't say anything about not going to school today and he said that it was because I said it was February vacation... eh heh... Great, so I could have been guilty of making my son a fucking truant because I couldn't pay attention to a calendar... Maybe it's this blonde wig that I keep wearing, maybe it's making my brain react like a stupid blonde... But even then, Stephanie is a real blonde and she got her kid off to school... I've really got to get my shit together, I guess. Whatever, he's going tomorrow and at least I don't have to worry about toting him around all week... eh heh...

Well, that's all for now, darlings. Have a lovely evening and a nice Tuesday for all of you! <3 <3 <3 *

+Rei Bathory+

I hate the general public...

Because you keep infecting me!!!!!! The stomach virus wasn't enough, huh? No. I've now got a fucking bronchial cough, the chills, a fever, and the stomach virus!!! How did this happen? Well, I went out this afternoon and drove to Littleton. The cigarettes up there are cheaper than they are around here, so I figured I'd get out and maybe feel a little better getting out...

WRONG! I came home and I just felt like death warmed over... Then the cough and all of the other crap started. And yes, I'm blaming it all on all of these assholes that don't cover their mouths when they cough. FUCKERS! GAH! I can't be sick right now! And the worst part about it is that every time I fucking cough I get pain shooting through my ribs... I might as well just break them and get it over with! eh heh...

That's been my day thus far - sickness... How's yours going? Oh, wait, my only reader is sick too! Curse you pedestrian fucking assholes for making good people sick!

+Rei Bathory+

This sucks...

I threw up so fucking much last night... I've never wretched so hard in my life. The puking has stopped, but now I think I might have bruised ribs thanks to my wonderful evening of vomiting... It hurts to cough, it hurts to laugh, and it just plain hurts to move... I don't even have any Percocet's to help deal with the pain.

I have a stomach bug, I know I do. And I also know where I got it from... Rob's brother and his family have had this bug since the beginning of the week. Yet, they kept coming over here anyway and now I'm infected. Rob and Timothy seem to be immune as they've not so much as had a drop of diarrhea...

Speaking of Timothy, I've got him all week this week... He's on February vacation and I'm going to have to drag him around everywhere I go. I have an appointment at Dartmouth this coming week for my headaches and that's a 4 hour ride back and fourth... eh heh... I'm sure we'll manage, but he's going to expecting things every time he sees a fast food joint or a store... Basically, it's going to be a long week... XD

Well, that is all for now, darlings! Did you notice the change in header? Yes, GPK week is over and now it's just back to random lyrics. The one that's up there now is from Blutengel's "Soul of Ice" song! <3 Have a lovely evening and a nice start to your Sunday! <3 <3 <3 *

+Rei Bathory+

A good and bad day...

Let's get to the bad parts first... I saw my therapist today and while I still like her, I sort of wish she was an addiction counselor, too. I tried explaining my Percocet problems to her, but she didn't have any advice or insight as to what to do... I must have ranted about Frank for half the time... XD That gave me a headache... eh heh...

The good part of today was that Rob's Valentine's Day present came in after a long wait... He was very happy with what I got him! However, the guy that said that he was going to send extras sent two DVD's that weren't even in their sleeves and Rob just tossed them. And speaking of presents, I got another one today!

It's a sock monkey, sort of like the one I got Jason for Christmas. This one is much bigger, though. It's wearing a hoody that says "You're amazing just the way you are" and it sings the lyrics and dances when you press his hand! I am so in love with it! <3 Rob is so awesome, always spoiling me... <3

Well, that is about all for now, darlings! Have a lovely evening and a nice start to your weekend! <3 <3 <3 *

+Rei Bathory+

The end...

No, I'm not going anywhere, but my psychiatrist is! ;.; I had my last appointment with her this afternoon and I sort of didn't want it to end... I've seen so many different mental health workers over the years that it would make your head spin, but never a psychiatrist like her. She's always on top of everything and I don't know how I'm going to get the same level of care from this new guy...

The reason I say that is because all of my psychiatrist's patients are being referred over to him. So I don't know if appointments will be shorter or if I'll get the same level of attention. I did manage to get her a thank you card and a small gift at the Hallmark store!

I wasn't expecting the reaction I got when she opened her gift... She didn't cry or anything, she told me that the wind chime I got her was something that she collects! The wind chime was a tiny one but it had a bluebird on it and she said that that's what she really likes! ^^ I guess she has a big tree that she hangs her wind chimes on and she said it would be perfect for it! <3

Well, that's all for now, darlings! I hope you're all having a great day/evening and a lovely Friday for you all! <3 <3 <3 *

+Rei Bathory+

I need this like a hole in the head... Or maybe that's what I do need...

Over the past 3 or 4 days, I've been getting severe headaches... The pain usually starts in the front or back of my head and then just encompasses the whole fucking thing. :\ I've been very bad about wearing my glasses lately, I hardly do it at all... These damn contacts are useless for the most part.

I just got off the phone with Dartmouth Neurology and I have an appointment scheduled for next Wednesday. I was supposed to go in January, but it would have just been for the nerve blocks again. That's one thing that Frank is good for, he does them better than my neurologist... eh heh... But I think I need something more this time... I don't know if it'll be another pill or what, but I'll do anything to rid myself of these fucking headaches...

Along with the headaches, I've been having problems driving lately. My eyes start playing tricks on me and I'm afraid of what might happen if this continues... You see, sometimes when I'm driving things sort of jump into my field of vision making it look like I'm going to go head on into another car, tree, snowbank, or whatever else... I'm just so afraid that if I see one of these cars heading straight for me, I'm going to swerve out into traffic and cause some serious damage...

Well, that is all for now, my darlings... I'm nice and drugged up again thanks to getting my Percs back as well as taking those muscle relaxers that my psychiatrist gave me. I hope all of you had a nice Valentine's Day like I did yesterday! A wonderful evening and a nice start to Thursday for all of you! <3 <3 <3 *

+Rei Bathory+

aki - kuchizuke/NO REASON (Type-A) (2007)

Being that it is the day of love and all, I thought that I'd share something that was really special. I'm also doing this for Rob as aki is one of his favorite artists and he encouraged me to upload this for you all! <3 I uploaded aki's "THE CELL MIXES" earlier last year, but very few people actually took it. I think the problem lies in the fact that aki and Laputa are just not as well known as some other Japanese acts. They never had a solid fanbase abroad... Then 2004 came around and Laputa broke up, which was really a tragedy because all of their music fucking rocks! Well, I'm not sure what happened to Junji and Tomoii I know that Kouichi is now involved in several projects and likes to go be "Everlasting K" now. aki's solo stuff is nearly impossible to find on the web. Part of it is because there are hundreds of aki's out there and it's nearly impossible to sort through them. However, I do have a bunch of his stuff if anyone wants it after listening to this. Again, though, aki's stuff is really super hard to come by, especially this. It took me over 30 minutes just to find that small picture of the single's cover... This single came in three types, A, B, and C each containing a different track 3. This one has an acoustic version of THE END from aki's first solo album "CONFLICT". Kuchizuke is amazing, in my opinion. It starts off so mellow and then becomes this insanely good rock track. NO REASON is great, too! aki's music always has such a distinct flavor, there's not a whole lot like it. His backing band may not be as good as Laputa, but they can definitely kick ass on their instruments! Okay, I'll stop talking now! Enjoy the single! And remember, this is Rob's, so all of the credit goes to him for getting a hold of it... I just rip and upload... eh heh aki - kuchizuke/NO REASON (Type-A) Tracklist: 01. kuchizuke 02. NO REASON 03. THE END (ACOUSTIC Ver.)
Download

Oh, happy day!!!!

Rob has outdone himself for Valentine's day this year! I'd been sitting around looking out the window for a good while waiting for him to come home... Timothy was sort of being a little shit today, so I had to keep going back and forth to do things for him and then it was back to the window! XD

When he pulled in I had Timothy open the door for him because I didn't want to see anything before I was supposed to... After having a cigarette and changing his clothes, Rob presented me with gifts! Lots of them!

I got TWO DOZEN roses, a bottle of perfume, a big box of candy, and he was even thoughtful enough to pick up a cake for us all to eat after dinner tonight! I felt so bad not having anything to give him, but I told him what was going on and he was still very understanding and he thanked me for ordering the DVD's for him! <3

Well, that is about all for now... I must go make our dinner so we can get into that cake! Plus I have to keep smelling my beautiful roses! <3 I hope all of you are having a nice Valentine's Day! And to my sick friends, I'm not trying to rub it in... ^^; But fuck it, Rob's getting everything and then some tonight! eh heh... Have a lovely evening and remember to be careful if you're one of those people who like bondage and asphyxiation because you don't want to hurt your partner on this special day! XD Who am I to talk? I drink Rob's blood every time that we fuck... So yeah, do whatever... Have a lovely evening and a great Wednesday! <3 <3 <3 *

+Rei Bathory+

I can't wait...

To get more drugs! Only two more days to go until I get my new script for my whole 14 little Percocet's... Better than nothing, I guess. But no, I'm also excited about Valentines Day tomorrow! I can't wait to see what Rob gets me! ^^;

Timothy and I have to do all of his little Valentines cards for his classmates tonight... Always last minute with that kid, I swear... XD I remember doing that in elementary school, it was always so much fun! There was this one kid who always wrote "Love" on his cards, it was kind of weird because nobody else did that... *Shrug*

I'm finally feeling human today, thankfully... I was tempted to take more Geodon today, but I didn't! Yay! Nope, just muscle relaxers, Tylenol, and some good old cutting for the pain today. The cuts weren't that deep and I have so many fresh ones that there's not much skin left to damage... eh heh...

Well, that's about all for now, darlings! I hope you're all having a wonderful day/evening and a nice Tuesday for you all! <3 <3 <3 *

+Rei Bathory+

Oh, I feel so horrible...

I'm completely out of Percocet and we don't even have any Tylenol in the house... *Sigh* I had no other option other than to take some of the muscle relaxers that my psychiatrist gave me and those knocked me out for a little while... Now I just feel foggy and weak...

Rob was extremely worried about me last night... I went to bed before him and he said that I was breathing funny because of all of those pills that I'd taken yesterday. Then I woke up at about 6:30 this morning and I was half hanging off of the bed... eh heh... I managed to get back on and slept until Timothy woke me up at 9:00...

I'm doing this now because I don't know how much longer I'll have the energy to type... I just feel so goddamn worn out and seeing as I'm not feeling much of anything right now, I figured this would be a good time to blog while I'm not in pain.

Don't worry about me, darlings... I'll be fine. Hopefully I can get my shit together and maybe I'll be back later. Until then, a lovely rest of the day and a nice start to the week for all of you! <3 <3 <3 *

+Rei Bathory+

Overboard with the pills again...

Not Percocet, I wish... I took a bunch of psych meds to get high this afternoon and I'm still paying for it as I type this... My head is in a fog, I can't walk straight, and I feel like I'm going to pass out. I don't think I overdosed, but I really have to stop fucking around with these anti-psychotics... Not good news... eh heh...

I just felt high after I took the pills, but within two hours I was sleeping on the couch and that lasted for about 3 hours... Then I ate dinner and it made me feel a little better, but not totally. Right now I've got some chocolate chip cookies baking and hopefully that will help get some of this crap out of my system...

And an update on Rob's Valentines Day gift... The guy did not send it out today as he said he would... *Sigh* He's not mailing until Monday but I guess he's gonna send some extra DVD's because of the long wait. That's a nice gesture, I think...


Well, I must get back to my cookies, darlings... Have a great evening and a nice Sunday for you all! <3 <3 <3 *

+Rei Bathory+

Almost Valentines Day...

And Rob's gift is nowhere to be seen... I ordered him some of his Japanese wrestling DVD's and the guy that I bought them from says they'll probably be shipping tomorrow... He doesn't usually ship priority either, so I'm worried that they won't be here in time... *Sigh* I've already made something to wear for him that night but I know he's buying me something and I want to reciprocate...

I personally don't like the guy that sells the DVD's... He's so erratic on when he ships that it's to the point of ridiculousness... Sometimes they'll go out in a matter of days, this time it's been over two weeks since I ordered them. I know that Rob will understand, he's been dealing with these people for a long, long time, but it doesn't make me feel any better...

Speaking of feeling better, I'm no longer as enraged as I was yesterday... I had a couple of pieces of some Percocet 30's that I was able to take today to relieve some of the pain. Now, I feel better at the moment but that could change as soon as these pills wear off... I always try to have something on hand, but I'm running lower than usual this week... *Sigh* I'll manage, I always do... Maybe I just think about it too much?

Well, that is all for now, darlings... I hope you're all having a wonderful day/evening and a nice start to the weekend for you! <3 <3 <3 *

+Rei Bathory+

Frank must die...

Fuck you, Frank... Take your 14 pills a week and shove them up your fucking ass! You bald-headed son of a bitch... I'm already out of fucking pills because you don't give me enough to maintain this agony... You try living like I do and see where this pittance gets you...

The business you work for claims to give people their lives back but in truth, you are taking mine away. Fine, I'm an addict, yes, I'll admit that. But I'm also in tremendous physical pain every day and no, it is not in my imagination...

Fuck you and all of those associated with you who put on their fake smiles when they make me submit to urine tests and count my pills every fucking week... I should sue your fucking ass but what chance do I have against a corporation? If I didn't have things to live for now, I'd fucking gut you like a fish...

+Rei Bathory+

I hate New Hampshire's college children...

So I had to go and get my Percocet's today and I almost ran over a few of these stupid motherfuckers... You see, I have to go all the way from North Woodstock to Plymouth (about 40 miles) to get my pills. Plymouth is home to Plymouth State University and of course, all of these little shits that attend there.

They think they own Plymouth center and Highland St. which is the route I take to get to Pain Care. They'll step out in the middle of the street without warning so I always go slow. But that still doesn't stop me from almost hitting them! They think that they have the right of way all of the fucking time!

I ran across one retard who looked like he was actually either retarded or really fucking high on something... I stopped for him, but he didn't do anything. I waved him across, but still nothing... So then I beeped at him and he fucking moved. Then there are the crosswalks between the campus buildings that run across Highland... They have these student crossing signs that actually light up when classes are in session and that's supposed to warn hell on wheels like myself that they'll be crossing. Again! There's no one out of all of the damn children that will stop for a car! GAH! I almost hit some girl who crossed as I was half in the crosswalk... I flipped her off and told her to get the fuck out of the road...

Anyway, I got my pills and I'm happy to be away from Plymouth right now... I swear, one of these days I'm going to kill these fucking pricks and bitches and it won't be with my car... eh heh...

Well, I'm done ranting now, darlings... I hope you all are having a nice day, a lovely evening and a wonderful Thursday for you! <3 <3 <3 *

+Rei Bathory+

The car swapping has to end...

Rob's brother and his family are really becoming a thorn in my side... For almost two weeks now, they've been borrowing my car off and on for various reasons. First and foremost because their car is having problems with brake fluid leaking and they're sort of afraid to drive it. With two small children, that is understandable...

However, the other day Rob's brother got pulled over because they didn't have a front license plate on the car. I asked him why it wasn't there and he thinks he lost it in a snow bank or something... They didn't have the money to replace it until today, so again, they've been using my car even for in town travel...

It's just a pain in the ass, really. My car is overdue for an oil change and between my driving and theirs, we've put over 18,000 miles on it in under a year... I don't need another dead car, especially when I'm still paying my parents back for this one... *Sigh* I've been talking to Rob about it and he's even willing to give them the money to get their car fixed when he gets his tax return...

Well, that's pretty much it for tonight, darlings... I haven't had much of an exciting day. I did end up having to cut again last night because of my extremely high pain level... I hope you're all having a wonderful day and a nice evening and lovely Wednesday for you all! <3 <3 <3 *

+Rei Bathory+

Clean bill of health... For now...

So I had a doctor's appointment today and I had to take Timothy with me. Luckily I thought to give him some toys to play with while I was in there. I told my doctor about the constant muscle spasms and involuntary movements, but he didn't seem overly concerned. He said that a lot of medications can cause these things, and to continue working with Pain Care and my psychiatrist regarding that.

Last night I had some serious ear pain and a burning feeling inside my ears, but when looked at, they were just a little pink inside, nothing serious. Then I got a throat culture which came back negative on the 5 minute test, but they're sending it out for a more thorough evaluation. Last time this happened, the 5 minute test was negative, too, but the longer test came back positive for strep. So that's why I put "For now" up there.

Other than that I had to go to Walmart to buy food and some other household items. Of course, Timothy had to get a toy and some play dough... eh heh... I'd rather him have the play dough and create things, but he's pretty imaginative with his action figures, too. I can't complain too much. By the time we were done in Walmart, I was in serious pain and I had no pills with me... The ride home was a long one, but thankfully Rob was there to unload the car and put things away while I loaded up on narcotics...

And of course, we have the big pink elephant in the room... That of course is the Patriots losing the Super Bowl last night... Rob was fucking pissed when they lost, I've rarely seen him so angry... It's a guy thing, I suppose. I mainly watch for the new commercials... I loved the Bud Light commercial with the "We-Go" dog! I don't think I've ever laughed so hard at a commercial! XD <3

And one more thing... You may notice that the header on my blog keeps changing... Well, I've decided to alternate GPKISM lyrics in and out on a daily basis for awhile... Just something for a change of pace. See if you can get which song they're from! ^^

Well, that's all for now, darlings. I hope you've all had a wonderful day and a nice evening ahead for you! <3 Have a lovely Tuesday! <3 <3 <3 *

+Rei Bathory+

Fucking immigrants...

I'm not going to go into a whole tirade on my feelings about illegal immigration... I'll just say that they should all be shot... No, I'm going to tell you about a specific set of immigrants at a store that I frequent.

I'm all for small business and the American Dream, but these people are douchebags and greedy ones at that. I go to their store because it is convenient and they're the only one in this area that carry my brand of cigarettes. It is fucking highway robbery what they charge, but it would cost the same in gas if I went somewhere else...

I was looking around the store because they have all of these cool little nick knack things that are pretty. But then the bitch at the counter came around and started acting sneaky. She was peering at me from different parts of the store making sure that I wasn't stealing... After I was done browsing I went to the counter to get my smokes...

She knows what I smoke so I just had to tell her how many. I then told her that she didn't have to follow me around the store because I'm not a thief... She completely denied it and said "I just making sure you didn't need anything." Bullshit. They're Asian people, I'm not sure what part of the continent they're from, but I do know that people that live in this area don't frequent their store because they're all racist hicks up here. This bitch should be thankful that I even come in to buy smokes...

It's not like I'm not going back, but I just don't appreciate being followed around like a criminal... Maybe that's common practice where they come from, but it's not here... I like it when the white lady is working there, but that's usually only in the morning on weekdays... :\

Well, that's my rant for the evening, darlings! I hope all of you are having a lovely evening and a nice start to the week for all of you! <3 <3 <3 *

+Rei Bathory+

Oh, how I wanted a quiet day...

But that didn't happen. Rob's brother and his girlfriend had to take my car up to Littleton to sell some games at Gamestop so that they could have some cash for various things... So Rob and I got stuck with Marissa and Jason for a few hours. It seems like this is happening more and more often as of late. I don't mind babysitting every once in awhile, but it's getting to be a bit much...

After they got back, they took Jason home but Timothy and Marissa wanted to play some more, so I agreed to let Marissa stay for awhile longer. She left at about 4:30 but I had to lend them my car again because theirs is leaking brake fluid and they don't like taking it long distances. I don't mind, just as long as they put gas in it and they're usually pretty good about doing that...

Then tomorrow Rob is on his own for a few hours with all three kids because Stephanie and I are going grocery shopping early in the morning. We figured this would be a good idea because it would beat the rush of Sunday (and Super Bowl) shoppers. Hopefully it works out that way. Both of our households are short on food and we need to go anyway, plus we need stuff for the game tomorrow!

Well, that's it for now, darlings. I hope you're all having a nice weekend and a lovely Sunday for you! Go Patriots! <3 <3 <3 *

+Rei Bathory+

The therapy is helping... And another visit with Frank...

So today I had two appointments pretty much back to back... The first was with my good buddy Frank at Pain Care. eh heh... The good news is that I will still be on my two Percocet's a day for another month. After that, who the fuck knows... He had little to say about my muscle spasms and stiffness other than I need to stop being so inactive. I don't think of myself as inactive, although, I guess he has a point considering that I don't do any kind of exercise at all...

Then there was my therapy appointment which I was actually looking forward to. I've developed a nice relationship with my new therapist over the few visits that I've had with her so far. She's very knowledgeable especially with cutting, as I found out that she is a reformed cutter herself... It's nice to have someone who understands what you're going through when it comes to this shit.

After that it was time to get Timothy off of the bus... He actually ate his lunch today which I was happy about. I don't like it when he won't eat because it makes me think that he's depressed. That's how I get when I'm in a deep depression, I want nothing to do with food... He came home and did his homework and then I let him go play his Wii...

Well, that's about all for now, darlings... I hope you're all having a nice day/evening and a wonderful start to the weekend for you! <3 <3 <3 *

+Rei Bathory+

Stupid washing machine...

Remember how last week I was complaining about dropping my ring in the washing machine? Well, that didn't happen again but now the washing machine is pretty much dead. I was trying to do a load of laundry last night and it kept making this funny noise that it hadn't ever made before... Rob said that it sounded like the motor was dead or dying...

So today I had to go to the fucking laundromat to wash clothes... I've seldom done this before because no matter where I've lived, I've always had a washing machine! I had to go to the bank to get quarters and then I had to play the waiting game at the laundromat because I was paranoid about people stealing my clothes! (What? A lot of that stuff is hand made!) At least it was warm in there...

After I was done there, I had to go and pick Timothy up at school and he was insistent that I buy him some McDonald's for lunch... I asked him why he was so hungry and he told me that he didn't eat the fucking lunch that I packed for him this morning... Why? Because he didn't like what was there... Damn children... I bought it for him, but I told him that that was it for treats for the week.

I have to go and see Frank tomorrow and I'm fearing the worst... I know that he's going to say that I'm going down to one pill a day and there's not going to be anything that I can do to change his mind. I am going to bring up all of these muscle spasms and stiffness to him and see if there's anything he can do on that end... These new pills I have aren't doing shit for them, so hopefully there's something else. I also have therapy tomorrow afternoon so at least I won't be just sitting around doing nothing all day...

Well, that is about all for now, my darlings... Have a lovely evening and a nice Friday, all of you! <3 <3 <3 *

+Rei Bathory+

Something to get off my chest... Or not...

I received a complaint today... Rob's brother came over to borrow $30 from me because he and his family are short on funds. I'm always happy to lend a hand when I can! However, he had something to say to me about Marissa... Apparently after they left last night, Marissa made a comment to her parents about me bending over and exposing my boobs to her...

First of all, I don't even remember doing it. Second of all, it's not like they fell out or anything... I had on a low cut top yesterday and yes, I was showing some cleavage... She asked her parents why my boobs are always hanging out or some shit like that. I guess it makes her uncomfortable... I told Rob's brother that I was sorry and that I didn't intentionally do it... He said just to be careful because he didn't want her going on about it in school and in turn get them in trouble... He said if it kept happening he wouldn't bring the kids over anymore...

This depressed me greatly... I felt so bad for making Marissa feel uncomfortable and not even knowing it. I happen to have a big chest and I can't do anything about it outside of spending some insane amount of money to get a reduction... What am I supposed to do about this?! Most of my tops fit nicely, I think, and I am proud of how I look so yeah, I like to show off my goods sometimes... I guess I'll just have to be more careful... *Sigh*

Other than that, I went to Pain Care to pick up my Percocet's today. They didn't piss me again which was good but Frank didn't write my script even though I'd called yesterday and asked that he do it... Luckily there was another doctor in the office who was able to write it. I had to do some food shopping, too, so I got a few things. Can you believe that a small bag of Dunkin Donuts coffee is almost ten dollars?! It is! I bought it anyway because that is what I like to have in the morning.

Well, not much else going on today, darlings... I hope all of you are having a wonderful evening and a nice Thursday for all of you! <3 <3 <3 *

+Rei Bathory+